“You know, this is my very basic beef with Pearl and Ezzo, et al. This very basic concept that THEY (the parent) control the hearts of their children. Wow, how incredibly god-like. I was pretty sure that the Bible says only GOD can rule the hearts of his children. Controlling the hearts of our children is the most ungodly principle in all of these methods. To obey God, we MUST turn their hearts over to God. We cannot control their hearts. We can control their outward actions. But, we cannot even know their hearts, much less control them.
Trust me, I learned how to make my parents think I was happy inside simply by how I acted on the outside. They never knew that instead of breeding the love and godly repentance and obedience they were demanding, they instead breed anger, hatred and bitterness (from all 3 of the children they raised this way). Why didn’t they know? Simply because they could not know our hearts. Had their nurtured our hearts, guided us with love and respect and instead been living models of the God they so desperately wanted us to love and follow, they would have breed the love and commitment that God intended parents to give their children. Two of us were fortunate that we didn’t close our hearts to the God our parents showed us and learned to see he was not the God our parents emulated. But, we became Godly adults in spite of our parents and not because of (but by the greater power of our Savior). The third has been lost for a long time, I don’t know if that sibling will ever accept the God of our parents who tried to play God instead of follow him.
Didn’t mean to go off. But, this is what is at the very heart of these programs that is so fundamentally against the call of our Saviour. And, I cannot fathom Christ doing anything but crying when his youngest children are treated by misguided parents who feel they must be gods versus follow God.” – Jo