Rosemary shares “a collection of thoughts on why – especially the Biblical reasons why –” They’ve Chosen Not To Spank.
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RedditDiscipline VS Neglect
March 19, 2013 13 Comments
Note from Hermana Linda: We appreciate getting comments and read every one. This comment from Pam is so long that Steph decided to respond in a post, so here it is.
Hi Steph,
Though I don’t consider myself to be “pro” spanking, I am pro-discipline, and I do believe that infrequent spanking can be part of an over-all discipline plan, when done properly and with love. I have raised two boys and I have two grandsons. I’ve also, taught children and volunteered to work with children in many circumstances. I care about kids and child abuse is a deep concern of mine. I was an abused child, in the forms of medical neglect, emotional neglect, emotional abuse, emotional incest, and sexual abuse by a predator. I also, found myself in several abusive situations as an adult and I agree that children are born with natural ways of standing up for themselves that shouldn’t be taken from them. We all need to be able to protect ourselves. I also, believe that children can be defiant and they need help in learning to use defiance as a way to protect themselves and not as a means of ending up in prison. Part of the neglect I experienced as a child had to do with discipline. I don’t remember any spankings but I was allowed to eat only candy to the point of having fillings in all of my teeth by the time I was six (I also, had abscesses) and all of my teeth falling out by the third grade. My parents excuse this by blaming it on me and my refusal to eat so, they let me eat what I wanted and all I wanted was candy. I was also, sick a lot and they gave me alcohol as medication, I think it put me to sleep and I was less of a bother. The first time they gave me too much and made me drunk was when I was cutting my first teeth. They’ve always told this as a such a funny story… [Read more...]
Would Jesus spank?
December 18, 2012 Leave a Comment
Flowermama looks at the question, “Would Jesus Spank?” As she looks at the Character of God as revealed in Scripture, her answer is, no. Of course, she does touch on the Rod of Proverbs.
Speaking of the Proverbial Rod, Tia Lynn looks at the question, Are The Rod Verses Literal or Figurative? Excellent post, I don’t know how it has taken me so long to find it.
Sarah’s Arguments Against Spanking
August 1, 2012 Leave a Comment
Sarah, of Under the Olive Branch, explains why she does not believe in spanking in a well researched and chatty post entitled, A person’s a person no matter how small. She also answers some common arguments for spanking with counter arguments, which many will find helpful.
It Starts With Our Views
April 4, 2012 Leave a Comment
Molly ponders The hypocrisy of children’s rights on Adventures in Parenting. I had similar thoughts when I heard a pastor mention that a pastor or Deacon must not be a striker (1 Tim 3:3 and Titus 1:7.) I whispered to my husband, “Ah, but they believe in striking children. Apparently they don’t consider children to be people.”
Also, veteran parent, Sally Clarkson, kicks off a new parenting series with Parenting: It all starts with your view of God.
How Does God Respond To His Children When They Sin?
February 9, 2012 Leave a Comment
Carissa Robinson looks at how God Responds To His Children When They Sin. Do we respond to our children the same way?
And to help us with that, Pearl in Oyster (PIO) explains how to use Natural Consequences in a gentle way as she continues her 52 Tool Card Series. This is a very important post as it is very easy to ruin the lesson with the wrong attitude.
Does God Spank His Children?
January 24, 2012 Leave a Comment
Carissa Robinson delves into the question, “Does God Spank His Children?“
The Effects Of Spanking Part 4 *Sensitive*
October 29, 2011 20 Comments
In the previous piece we looked at how spanking/abuse negatively effects the development of empathy in children. We also saw that any type of physical punishment can cause aggressive tendencies in children and adults. Physical punishment also leads to anger in children and adults due to being hurt intentionally by the very people that are supposed to love and protect them. In this piece, we will see that fear is the main effect of hitting children. We will see that by teaching children that God wants them to be spanked, they often develop a fear of God which either strains their relationships with God or causes them to reject Him altogether. Finally, we will see that spanking “in love” is indeed harmful despite what many pro-spankers claim.
Fear-“That child needs the fear of the Lord put in him!”
We have all heard that line from pro-spankers a number of times. As I pointed out Part 5 in my series, “Spanking is NOT God’s Will,” putting the fear of God into a child is one of the primary reasons people spank children. They use fear and respect as interchangeable concepts when they have no similarities in their meanings. (See Part 6 of “The Christian History of Spanking for more info). Fear is indeed the primary effect experienced by all children who are physically punished whether mildly or severely. Pain is why physical punishment is effective, though only temporally, as most humans are afraid of pain and will usually do everything in their power to avoid it. It usually takes only 1 or 2 times of a young child being hit for him/her to become afraid of getting spanked. Most pro-spankers, especially Christians, view this fear as a good thing, and even a must, in order to teach children to obey them and ultimately God. Yet, 2 Timothy 1:7 states, “For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.” And 1 John 4:18 says that there is no fear in love. Fear comes from satan. “Courage comes from God, while fear is what Satan tries to give us” (Meyer, 2011, p. 272). Throughout the Bible God tells His people not to be afraid of Him. [Read more...]
Jesus: Gentle Parent
September 26, 2011 1 Comment
Little Hearts Gentle Parenting Resources posts about Jesus, The Gentle Parent and how we can learn from Him and His example.
The Effects of Spanking – Part 3 *Sensitive*
September 17, 2011 12 Comments
In the last piece I discussed one of the major effects of spanking, which is denial. We also looked at repression and the continuum of violence against children. If a swat or light slap on a child’s hand or bottom is intended to cause pain to the child, then it is a form of violence against the child just as it is for adults. Children are not sub-humans, and do not deserve to have pain inflicted upon them because they are unable to behave like adults. As we’ve seen in my last two series, “Spanking is NOT God’s Will,” and “The Christian History of Spanking,” God never intended us to spank our children. This series further proves this as it is showing the very harmful effects of spanking children—even if it’s done “lovingly” and by Christian parents. In this piece, I will be discussing how spanking effects empathy, anger, and aggression in children and adults.
Empathy—“That Child Needs a Good Spanking!”
We hear the above statement, “That child needs a good spanking,” by many advocates of spanking as if they have no empathy for what the child is actually experiencing or the pain a “good spanking” will cause the child both physically and emotionally. As we saw in Part 2 of this series, many pro-spankers were spanked/abused as children themselves but have repressed their pain and are now in denial that hitting children does in fact cause harm. This denial can often, and does indeed, lead to a lack of empathy when it comes to children as well as other adults. [Read more...]
Christians Who Don’t Spank and Why
September 8, 2011 1 Comment
I came across 2 Christian bloggers who very eloquently explain why they don’t spank.
Spanking…..The Post I Finally Had to Write and Spare the Rod: What Spanking Teaches Children by Amanda at Not Just Cute
To spank or not to spank? by Raqual at Connected Christian Mom
Reflecting the Character of God
July 22, 2011 Leave a Comment
The Hippie Housewife discusses how we should reflect the character of God for our children. She looks at how attachment parenting looks a lot like how God cares for us and warns us about 3 heresies which are cropping up in many Christian teachings.
Along the same lines, Pearl In Oyster (PIO) explains that we should imitate how God disciplines His children. She uses her testimony of how God treated her when she was out of His will as an example.
Who is God?
January 22, 2011 Leave a Comment
Molly asks, “Who is God?“ as she shares her testimony of how she learned to see God as a Gentle Parent, rather than a Vengeful Judge.
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