Have you seen the Facebook meme about being afraid of a world run by adults who were never spanked? Well, Dara Stoltzfus Imagines such a world.
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RedditLearning Forgiveness
September 6, 2012 Leave a Comment
Many Christians teach that children must be punished for their misbehavior in order to learn. But what do they learn? Do they need to be punished in order to forgive themselves? Dara Stoltzfus looks at what the Bible teaches about forgiveness and punishment in How to Teach Forgiveness.
Grace Is For Mothers, Too
May 2, 2012 Leave a Comment
The Hippie Housewife reminds us that grace is for mothers too in These Days Don’t Define You.
How Does God Respond To His Children When They Sin?
February 9, 2012 Leave a Comment
Carissa Robinson looks at how God Responds To His Children When They Sin. Do we respond to our children the same way?
And to help us with that, Pearl in Oyster (PIO) explains how to use Natural Consequences in a gentle way as she continues her 52 Tool Card Series. This is a very important post as it is very easy to ruin the lesson with the wrong attitude.
The Christian History of Spanking Part 4
May 14, 2011 Leave a Comment
( Part 1 ) ( Part 2 ) ( Part 3)
In this paper of this series in which I am exploring the Christian history of spanking, I would like to begin by discussing some of John Calvin’s beliefs in regards to children as many of the people that we have discussed in this series have been highly influenced by Calvin’s beliefs. After I discuss John Calvin, we will look at Jonathan Edwards as he still influences some Christian advocates of spanking children. It is my hope that people are discovering for themselves that spanking is from man, not from God as we go through this historic journey together.
John Calvin
John Calvin (1509-1564) was one of the primary figures in the Protestant Reformation. He became a born again Christian in 1533. He then became a Protestant pastor in Geneva, Switzerland, and created the Geneva Academy after returning from exile in 1542. “Calvin’s major institutional contribution to education was his Geneva Academy, which he established upon his return from exile. The academy was divided into two schools. The private school taught children until about age sixteen, and the public school served as the university” (Reed & Provost, 1993, p. 197). Calvin believed in the strict religious education of children, and the Geneva church controlled the academy. The teachers employed by the church were well versed in Calvin’s strict disciplinarian approach that often included physical punishment. The following poem shows exactly how John Calvin felt regarding the use of physical punishment with children:
Who spares the rod with spirit mild,
He surely hates and harms his child.
Stripes and fear are right;
But who disowns their might,
And trains his son in tender way,
Unfits him for life’s earnest fray” (Reed & Provost, 1993, p. 198).
It is clear from this poem that Calvin had no understanding of lovingly admonishing children as well as adults as Colossians 3:16 tells us to do. Nor did he seem to understand Christ’s teaching of forgiveness (Luke 3:3; Luke 24:47). And I must wonder if he knew that gentleness and patience are some of the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23).
Before I get too deeply into Calvin’s beliefs about children, I would like to take a look into how society in general viewed children and childhood during the 16th century. [Read more...]
The Christian History of Spanking Part 3
April 12, 2011 Leave a Comment
Jonathan Wesley (1703-1791) is known as the founder of Methodism, and for the effects he had (and still has) on the education of children and adults. In Part 2, I looked at the child-rearing practices of his mother, Susanna Wesley, whom many Christian advocates of spanking hold up as a model for Christian mothers. Susanna gave John special attention as he almost died in one of the house fires. John deeply loved his mother, and it has been said that he didn’t think he could ever find a woman like his mother to marry. Now, before we say that his mother’s child-rearing practices couldn’t have been that bad if he loved her that much, it is well documented that abused children that have been taken away from their abusive parents will cry and ask, “If I’m really good tomorrow, can I go home to my mommy and daddy?” As I point out in Part 5 of my series called, “Spanking is NOT God’s Will,” children have a very forgiving nature and love their parents no matter what. That’s how I was with my dad despite his physical abuse. He said he was sorry many times throughout my childhood, and I always forgave him. Now some pro-spankers may argue that there’s a line between abuse and spanking. My dad never left marks on my body, but it was indeed abuse as he’d hit and be rough with me for things out of my control. My mom only spanked me once, and though she never apologized, I forgave her within the week. Though both my parents were wrong for hitting me, I’ve long forgiven both of them and have a great relationship with my mom. So, for all those who claim spankings didn’t hurt them, I must ask that they truly think about how they felt right before, during, and afterwards because when children are hurt by the closest people in their lives, it does harm and hurt, otherwise there wouldn’t be so much denial and controversy over using physical punishment with our children! And if spanking (hitting) children was ordained by God, then there would be NO questions or controversy among Christians and the secular world regarding the amount of harm spanking a child does as Scripture clearly states, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. [Read more...]
The Christian History of Spanking Part 2
March 26, 2011 18 Comments
Susanna Wesley (1669-1742) is held up as the “Mother of Methodism.” She married Samuel Wesley who was a pastor. The Wesley’s had a total of 19 children, but only 10 of the children survived past infancy. Susanna, as most Puritans, valued education. However, she even taught her daughters as well as her sons how to read and write which was not common during the 18th century (Heitzenrater, 2001). She also allowed each child to do what he/she could for their selves starting from birth. Susanna was a very devoted mother.
Before we get too deeply into Susanna’s child rearing beliefs and practices, we must take a brief look at how children were viewed by most during the 18th century. During this time period, children were seen as miniature adults. They were dressed like adults and were expected to behave like adults at very young ages. The quicker they behaved like adults, the better. Otherwise, children were not to be seen or heard. They were kept out of the room where adults were. Throughout the 18th century, this view of children slowly evolved as a sort of discovery of childhood occurred. This change was not necessarily a positive one for children. Instead of the high expectation for children to be adult-like as soon as possible (which, of course, was negative in and of itself since we now know how important childhood truly is), children were seen as inferior to adults. [Read more...]
Is Punishment Biblical?
January 29, 2011 Leave a Comment
Rach at The Incorrigible Gingers discusses the question, “Is Punishment Biblical?“ Notice that she is not just referring to corporal punishment here but all punishment. Now, that is a really radical thought.
Spanking is Wrong
January 24, 2011 Leave a Comment
Molly explains why spanking is wrong according to the Bible.
Spanking is NOT God’s Will Part 6
January 18, 2011 Leave a Comment
( part 1 ) ( part 2 ) ( part 3 ) ( part 4 ) ( part 5 )
The following is based on a comment from a pro-spanker to Part 5 of my series. Spanking does not automatically mean you will have a bad relationship with your children. If you have not read my entire series, I highly recommend you do so. Remember, children are very forgiving and want to be in their parents’ good graces.
It is clear from the Hebrew translations that God does NOT want children to be spanked (hit). Proverbs is Wisdom Literature. It is not meant to be taken out of context. The verse cited Hebrews 12:5-6 is not talking about physical punishment nor young children. Yes, God disciplines us as His children. Discipline means to TEACH. God does not punish us. Jesus rebuked His disciples, but He NEVER punished them. Even after Peter denied Jesus, Jesus FORGAVE him! [Read more...]
Spanking is NOT God’s Will Part 5
January 13, 2011 4 Comments
( part 1 ) ( part 2 ) ( part 3 ) ( part 4 )
Forgiveness. It’s the main theme of Christianity. As Christians, we are forgiven because God sent Jesus to Earth to be the Atonement for all our sins, past, present, and future. Through the precious blood of Christ, we are made clean. “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life” John 3:16. We no longer have to pay for our sins as the people of the Old Testament did through sacrificial offerings of usually animals. Blood is a big deal throughout the Holy Bible. [Read more...]
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