Letter to A Pro-Spanker

The Melting Mom has written a letter to her pro-spanking friend to explain what she has learned about gentle parenting. This is a fantastic letter and I know that you will find it helpful.

I would also like to remind everyone that Gentle Christian Mothers is a very good place for mothers who are seeking to be gentle to find support.

Analyzing A Problematic Post by Pearl

Sarah at Field of Vision has started a small series of posts looking at the Pearl’s teachings and specifically their attitude towards children.  This series focuses on one particular article by Michael Pearl called, Emotional Manipulators.

Part 1: Parenting and the Power of Perspective in which she discusses how Michael Pearl assigns negative intent to a 4 year old child and her mother.

Part 2: Michael Pearl and Responding to Attention Seekers in which she discusses Michael Pearl’s diagnosis of the child and his very harsh proposed remedy.

She may post more of this series in the future, in which case I will add them to this post.

The Heart of the Matter

Rachel Miller, who blogs at A Daughter of The Reformation, discusses her concerns about the Pearls which go far being spanking or use of the rod and to The Heart Of The Matter.

Since the NY Times article about the Pearls, the story has gone all the way Down Under, as this story in The Sydney Morning Herald demonstrates.

Speaking of the NY Times article, here are the Letters To The Editor  about it.

Also, QuicksilverQueen  is still writing her detailed Book Review of To Train Up A Child and how it relates to the deaths.  In this review she freely shares how being raised by these teachings affected her and what she was really feeling when her parents thought that she was joyously submissive. She has reviewed the first 3 chapters.

Christians Who Don’t Spank and Why

I came across 2 Christian bloggers who very eloquently explain why they don’t spank.

Spanking…..The Post I Finally Had to Write and Spare the Rod: What Spanking Teaches Children by Amanda at Not Just Cute

To spank or not to spank? by Raqual at Connected Christian Mom

Series on First Time Obedience

Cindy of Under Much Grace has posted part 5 of her series about First Time Obedience: Revisiting First Time Obedience: Finding New Alternatives

For your convenience I will paste here the links to the rest of the series along with her descriptions:

  • A review of the submission required under multigenerational faithfulness as Vision Forum’s carryover from Bill Gothard’s submission teachings with various examples of this demand for unquestioned obedience without credulity. First post specifically examining “First Time Obedience” in young children.
  • A review of the principle of sacerdotalism and parental convenience (as a control issue in dysfunctional families) as rationales for requiring “First Time Obedience” and “leaps of faith” required under multigenerational faithfulness.
  • Review of the tendency to make every banal daily activity one of great eternal spiritual significance as a consequence of works-based salvation. Includes a discussion of viewing personality traits that do not fit the belief system’s paradigm as sinful as well as the building up of all gender related activities as sacramental for the impartation of inward sanctification.
  • Blog host’s personal experience with inherent personality traits treated by parents as sin, the idolatry of seeking parental approval, and the consequences of requiring unquestioned submission with the use of guilt and shame that predisposes one to easy brainwashing and compliance with thought reform. Includes a section from Biderman’s Chart of Coercion addressing the powerful effects of devaluing individuals in religious settings.
  • Discussion of the development of how perfectionism, works-based salvation and First Time Obedience squelch problem-solving skill and prevent the development of critical thinking under the guise of multigenerational faithfulness.

A specific review of the theological problems in Voddie Baucham’s defense of First Time Obedience as well as the refutation of the practice from Scripture. Echos concerns noted in this previous blog post concerning Baucham’s “Family Driven Faith” book.

Why churches are failing

Thriller Author has written a blog post at HubPages called Why Churches Are Failing.

This is a rather harsh wake up call for all Christians to consider and I believe that it is warranted. The Pearls’ teachings are mentioned in passing along with Ezzo’s.

I don’t know exactly what these HubPages are but I notice that they also have a positive review of To Train Up A Child. Needless to say, I do not agree with her conclusions of this book. It looks like members of this Hub can vote for the pages and affect their ratings. Hmmmm . . .

For more realistic reviews of To Train Up A Child, please see my list of reviews.