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The Effects of Spanking Part 6 *Sensitive*

February 21, 2012 By Steph 4 Comments

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5)

In the last part of this series we saw how teaching children to equate love with pain can cause them to become sadomasochistic.  We also saw how spanking children, even when done “lovingly” and the “right way,” causes many children to struggle with depression, guilt, and shame as having pain intentionally inflicted on them by their parents never makes them feel positive about themselves.  In this concluding piece of this series, we will see how spanking keeps the vicious cycle of abuse and authoritarian parenting going for generations unless one fights against it.  New research shows that children that are physically punished/abused can develop a form of Stockholm Syndrome as they deny and repress their pain.  Also, I will be showing that intentionally inflicting pain on children causes brain damage as the brain gets rewired due to experiencing pain and trauma throughout childhood.  Many parents do not realize how vulnerable the young, developing brain is.  Finally, I will be explaining the Scientific Method of conducting research in order to disprove the claim of a great deal of pro-spankers that all the research proving spanking is harmful is somehow biased.  I hope this series further proves that spanking did not come from God otherwise none of these harmful effects would ever occur.

The Cycle of Abuse and Authoritarian Parenting—“My parents spanked me and I survived and so will my children!”
[Read more...]

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The Effects Of Spanking Part 5 *Sensitive*

November 29, 2011 By Steph 9 Comments

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)

In the previous piece we discovered that fear is the main effect of corporal punishment that all children experience despite the Bible clearly stating that fear is not from God. We also saw in the previous piece that “loving, godly” spankings are indeed harmful to children despite what many pro-spankers continue to claim. The research and numerous anecdotes (personal stories) show that hitting “in love,” and in the Name of God often has damaging effects on children even if they deny and repress these effects. In this piece we will be discussing an effect of “lovingly” spanking that has only recently come to my attention. Many people are unaware of the fact that “love” spankings causes sexual problems for children and adults as they seek to turn something painful and out of their control into something pleasant and somewhat controllable. This brief discussion may cause discomfort. We will also discuss how physical punishment often leads to depression, shame, and guilt as spanking never makes one feel good about oneself.

“Love” Spankings Continued—“Children are not sexual beings.”

Many people, in general, believe the above statement to be true. While children do not understand sexuality in the way that adults do, they have the ability at birth to become somewhat aroused and to feel pleasure. This is why young children very innocently explore their bodies during diaper changes and baths. This is a very normal and healthy part of the young child’s development. By the age of two, most young children are beginning to notice the differences between males and females and will ask questions out of pure curiosity. Simple, honest answers are all that young children want and need. While a child’s budding sexuality should be respected, their innocence and purity must be protected. [Read more...]

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The Effects Of Spanking Part 4 *Sensitive*

October 29, 2011 By Steph 20 Comments

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3)

In the previous piece we looked at how spanking/abuse negatively effects the development of empathy in children.  We also saw that any type of physical punishment can cause aggressive tendencies in children and adults.  Physical punishment also leads to anger in children and adults due to being hurt intentionally by the very people that are supposed to love and protect them.  In this piece, we will see that fear is the main effect of hitting children.  We will see that by teaching children that God wants them to be spanked, they often develop a fear of God which either strains their relationships with God or causes them to reject Him altogether.  Finally, we will see that spanking “in love” is indeed harmful despite what many pro-spankers claim.

Fear-“That child needs the fear of the Lord put in him!”

We have all heard that line from pro-spankers a number of times.   As I pointed out Part 5 in my series, “Spanking is NOT God’s Will,” putting the fear of God into a child is one of the primary reasons people spank children.  They use fear and respect as interchangeable concepts when they have no similarities in their meanings.  (See Part 6 of “The Christian History of Spanking for more info).  Fear is indeed the primary effect experienced by all children who are physically punished whether mildly or severely.  Pain is why physical punishment is effective, though only temporally, as most humans are afraid of pain and will usually do everything in their power to avoid it.  It usually takes only 1 or 2 times of a young child being hit for him/her to become afraid of getting spanked.  Most pro-spankers, especially Christians, view this fear as a good thing, and even a must, in order to teach children to obey them and ultimately God.  Yet, 2 Timothy 1:7 states, “For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.”  And 1 John 4:18 says that there is no fear in love.  Fear comes from satan.  “Courage comes from God, while fear is what Satan tries to give us” (Meyer, 2011, p. 272).  Throughout the Bible God tells His people not to be afraid of Him.  [Read more...]

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The Effects of Spanking – Part 3 *Sensitive*

September 17, 2011 By Steph 12 Comments

(Part 1)  (Part 2)

In the last piece I discussed one of the major effects of spanking, which is denial.  We also looked at repression and the continuum of violence against children.  If a swat or light slap on a child’s hand or bottom is intended to cause pain to the child, then it is a form of violence against the child just as it is for adults.  Children are not sub-humans, and do not deserve to have pain inflicted upon them because they are unable to behave like adults.  As we’ve seen in my last two series, “Spanking is NOT God’s Will,” and “The Christian History of Spanking,” God never intended us to spank our children.   This series further proves this as it is showing the very harmful effects of spanking children—even if it’s done “lovingly” and by Christian parents.  In this piece, I will be discussing how spanking effects empathy, anger, and aggression in children and adults.

Empathy—“That Child Needs a Good Spanking!”

We hear the above statement, “That child needs a good spanking,” by many advocates of spanking as if they have no empathy for what the child is actually experiencing or the pain a “good spanking” will cause the child both physically and emotionally.  As we saw in Part 2 of this series, many pro-spankers were spanked/abused as children themselves but have repressed their pain and are now in denial that hitting children does in fact cause harm.  This denial can often, and does indeed, lead to a lack of empathy when it comes to children as well as other adults. [Read more...]

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More Investigation from CNN

August 18, 2011 By Hermana Linda 5 Comments

CNN continues its investigative report of abuse among fundamental Christians and how it relates to the Pearls’ teachings.  Jocelyn Zichterman, who was raised in this culture and started Freedomfromabuse.net, explains the concept of Breaking The Will and how spankings must continue until the child submits even if it takes several hours. This video seems to cut suddenly, I’m wondering if this series will continue.

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The Effects of Spanking Part 1 *Sensitive*

August 15, 2011 By Steph 4 Comments

What are the effects of spanking?  Is it true that as long as one does it the “right, loving, godly” way that there are no harmful effects to the child?  Are the research studies claiming that spanking is harmful biased and inaccurate?  What about the studies claiming that not all spankings are harmful?  These are just a few of the questions I will explore throughout this series.  We have already explored why Scripture or God does not support using physical punishment with our children despite what many Christian pro-spankers say.  We have read many stories of parents trying to do the right thing for their children, but harmed or killed them in the process all because satan had tricked them into believing that using physical punishment was what God wanted.  In this series, we will hear from many who were spanked as children and how it affected them and their relationships with God.  If God hasn’t spoken to hearts in my previous series, I pray He will with this series.  Please, allow God to speak to you as you read this series.  He will not condemn you.

My Story

I have touched on my story here and there throughout my series, but I haven’t actually told my story until now.  What I am about to write is quite difficult for me.  Parts of it my own husband didn’t even know.  But I am trusting God to use my pain for His Glory.  I grew up in a non-active Christian home.  We had Jesus figurines and the Ten Commandments on the wall, but we didn’t go to church.  I had Bibles and Bible storybooks, but God was not emphasized.  I was born with severe Cerebral Palsy.  When I was born, I did not breathe for roughly 40 minutes.  The doctors were about to give up on me but my dad about punched one of them and told them not to give up on me.  I’m grateful God did not let my dad allow the doctors to give up on me.  God had/has a plan for me. [Read more...]

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The Christian History of Spanking Part 6

July 18, 2011 By Steph 2 Comments

( Part 1 ) ( Part 2 ) ( Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5)

This will be the conclusion of this series in which we have explored and discovered some of the origins of spanking children within Christianity.  It was my goal to show that spanking is from man and not God, as so many well-meaning Christians have believed throughout the ages.  In this paper, I will show how the idea of controlling children dates back to the early church in the ancient world, look at how Catholicism has advocated and used physical punishment with children, show the likely origin of the “Christian rules of how to spank children,” and will conclude with explaining Behaviorism and how physical punishment falls under that very old and outdated branch of Psychology.

The Origins of the Christian Need to Control Children

Many Christian advocates of spanking as well as the parents who follow these advocates are often quite concerned with controlling their children’s behavior, and really, one could say controlling their children.  Advocates such as James Dobson, the Ezzos, the Pearls, and others teach parents that they must be in control of their children from birth.  They claim that newborn infants must be taught that their parents are the bosses, not them.  If this sounds familiar, it is because control and breaking children’s wills go hand and hand.  We’ve seen how breaking the child’s will has been advocated for and done by Christians throughout history despite there being no biblical grounds for doing such a thing (See Parts 1, 2, & 3 for more info on breaking children’s wills).  This need for adults to control their children dates back to New Testament times.  In fact, certain verses of the New Testament are used to try and justify controlling one’s children. [Read more...]

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The Effect of Spanking on Children

July 9, 2011 By Hermana Linda 1 Comment

Carissa Robinson shares a true story of how spanking affected one child growing up in Lock ‘Em Up, Throw Away the Key.

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The Right Way to Spank?

June 23, 2011 By Hermana Linda 1 Comment

Dulce de Leche questions the common idea that spanking is not harmful when done without anger in Spanking In Anger — What Does It Matter?

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