By now, people have read my very personal story. I can’t begin to put into words how difficult that was for my family and me. As I said in Part 1, the purpose of this series is to explore all of the effects of using physical punishment with children. In this piece, I will be discussing denial as one of the many effects of spanking (hitting) children. I will also share a couple of definitions of physical abuse, and will discuss the continuum of violence against children.
Denial—“I was spanked and I turned out OK”
One of the many, and most visible if one looks closely enough, effects of spanking and physical abuse is denial. Denial is a psychological defense mechanism to any traumatizing or painful event. This is why denial is one of the first steps in the grieving process. It is easier to deny that something very painful has occurred than to deal with the pain head on. How many times have we heard, “I was spanked and I’m okay,” from pro-spankers? Go on the Internet and Google “spanking children,” and we get an array of pro-spankers arguing intensely with anti-spankers about how spanking isn’t harmful. They base their arguments on their personal experiences. They are often quick to become defensive, and even get downright angry, when anti-spankers try to gently point out how and why they are wrong. This is due to the fact that it is very difficult to admit that their parents did hurt them as children, or that they are now hurting their own children. [Read more...]