Lisa’s Response to Debi Pearl’s Prayer for the destruction of her enemies

Lisa has said very well what I have had neither the time nor energy to write so I am going to give her comments the exposure they deserve.

In response to my post regarding Debi Pearl’s public prayer asking God to destroy her enemies, Lisa said:

I read the article, also, and I was appalled. A prayer should not ever need excuses for why it sounds like a prayer for another human being’s death.

What if they had asked God to open their eyes and hearts and show them ‘if there is any hurtful way in them, and lead them in the everlasting way’? What if they had asked God if they had a log in their eyes that they needed to remove in order to see more clearly? What if they had asked God to bless these people?

When Jesus said to pray for our enemies, I think he meant to pray for their good and their welfare. I think that if someone attacks you, the very first thing you should do is examine whether there is any merit to their complaint. After that, humble oneself and depend on God.

I think that to compare any human beings to attacking dogs is a mistake. The Psalms may contain references like this but these are preshadowings of Christ’s affliction. We are not Christ, and we are now in the New Testament and Christ has taught us to love our enemies and do good to those who would despitefully use us. None of the apostles, nor Steven, prayed for the death of their enemies.

Finally, if I had ever written a book that led 1 other person (much less 3) to abuse their child to the point of killing them, I would be devastated beyond description. I would take that book off the market and burn every copy and repent on my face before God. Wouldn’t you?

I replied and she then went on to say:
[Read more…]

Are the Pearls praying for the death of their enemies?

It would appear that the Pearls are facing legal problems over the damages their teachings have caused.  Vyckie Garrison reports on this in an article entitled, “Evangelical couple begs God to strike critics dead over child abuse claims.”

When I saw this article, was surprised. I feel that I know quite a bit about the Pearls and I know that they strive to be good Christians. I disagree with fundamental aspects of their teachings on child rearing to the point that I consider much of it dangerous. However, I do believe that they are sincerely trying to serve the Lord.  So, I read the article right away, looking for what Debi Pearl really said.

She starts out describing a time when Mr. Pearl was brutally attacked by dogs while serving the Lord. She explains how this was really a satanic attack. She then likens it to this new legal attack. She decries her attackers which she explains are also led by the forces of darkness. She then tells of a time when the Lord delivered them by destroying their attacker. She did not say that someone died, but it is easy to come to that conclusion. She exhorts her followers and ends by asking for prayer, giving her followers a sample prayer. Here the excerpt in question:

…we ask that you step in and bring down the evil that is set against Michael Pearl’s family. Bring to an end all those that testify in lies and deceit.

Now, I can totally see where people would interpret that to mean that they are asking for people’s death, but I also suspect that they would be shocked and offended at that interpretation.  I suspect that are asking for an end to the evil and that a change of heart would cause there to be no more people testifying against them. Of course, I can’t speak for them, but that is how I read their words.

Either way, the prayer is appalling. One of my commenters expressed why very well here.

Debi Pearl Thinks It’s A Lie

And also important, a book was found inside, a book that appeared to light the fuse to the deadly brutality. The book is called "To Train Up a Child."

“And also important, a book was found inside, a book that appeared to light the fuse to the deadly brutality. The book is called ‘To Train Up a Child.'”

Poor Debi Pearl, she is so confused.  It is so very sad.  She considers our warnings against her and her husband’s teachings to be a lie, akin to the lies Hitler told.   She states in this article that  the parents who killed their children never read their books and that they were not found in their homes.  How can she really believe that when the official documents (*trigger warning*) say that they did find their books*?   Not only that, but many friends of the families have confirmed to me that they were avid Pearl followers who not only recommended their books but even gave them away.  I have explained our problems and concerns with their teachings over and over again and can only assume that they are so sure that they are lies that they don’t even read them.  There are none so blind as those who will not see.

*The link above marked trigger warning is the sheriff’s affidavit of what was found in the Williams house.  The CNN report says that the book To Train Up A Child (shown in my featured image) was found in the Schatz house.

Always The Woman’s Fault?

Forgedimagination responds to an article by the Pearls in Cloistered Fruit: (Not) An Open Letter To The Pearls.   This is a rather extreme example of their teaching that everything comes down to being the fault of the woman (or in this case, women.)

Is Debi Pearl to Blame?

Livinginblurredlines shares how the advice in Debi Pearl’s book, Created To Be His Help Meet negatively affected her marriage.  However she does not want to put the blame on Debi Pearl saying,

Blaming Debi Pearl’s “Created To Be His Helpmeet” book for what I am going through is like blaming a cookbook for your burned dinner.

I’m not so sure I agree with that. If the cookbook tells me to cook the dinner for 30 minutes at 350 and I cook the dinner for 3o minutes at 350 and it burns, I’m going to warn people that the cookbook has some bad information in it.  Sure, I should have kept an eye on the food and noticed if it started burning and saved my dinner.  But whether I saved my dinner or not, the cookbook has shown itself to contain unreliable information and people should be warned about it.

That said, she makes some  good points, especially that one should look to God first and foremost.  Amen.

More on Created To Be His Help Meet

Sheila Wray Gregoire discusses Debi Pearl, Wife Abuse and True Submission in Submission Doesn’t Mean Lying Over And Taking It.   The discussion in the Comments is also very interesting.  It was there that I found he following link:

Natalie at Dusty Feet has been working on a very detailed book review of Created To Be His Help Meet.

A Complementarian’s Concerns With Created To Be His Help Meet

Complementarian Tim Challies analyses Debi Pearl’s book, Created To Be His Help Meet and points out his concerns with the teachings therein.

Part 1 looks at the harsh and critical spirit and the foolish counsel.

Part 2 looks at “poor theology, poor use of Scripture and far too little gospel.”

This is an excellent review to share with complementarians.

A Warning About Extreme Submission

Mrs. Jacks shares her testimony of How Submission Books Nearly Ruined her Marriage.

CTBHH – Dangerous Advice with Heresy

ChucklesTravels reviews Created To Be His Helpmeet by Debi Pearl which he deems Dangerous Advice mixed with a lot of Heresy.

How To Be A Good Wife

Aubry Grace  looks at the fallacy of trying to follow the advice in books like Created To Be His Help Meet by Debi Pearl and An Excellent Wife by Martha Peace in her post, The Gospel Driven Marriage: How To Be A Good Wife.  Excellent advice which I think every married person should read.

And in the interest of fairness, here is a good post for the unmarried to read. <3

The Pearls’ Book NOT Banned in New Zealand (Working on Amazon)

New Zealand’s Censorship Compliance Unit has decided not to ban nor restrict Michael and Debi Pearl’s book, To Train Up A Child, according to this article in the Marlborough Press.  While I don’t believe in book banning, it seems to me that if a country has that policy, this book should fall into that category and I am a bit confused as to how they reached their decision.

I do believe in encouraging book sellers to stop selling offensive books and so does  Milli Hill at Peaceful Parenting who explains why Amazon should stop selling books which promote Child Abuse, especially To Train Up A Child. This piece includes a long quote from Debi Pearl in which she explains how one should use the switch on a child under one year old.

Note: The petition to which she links is the same one to which I link in my side bar. If you have not signed it, please sign it and share the link. Thank you.

Book Review of “The Vision” by Debi Pearl

I have been aware for some time of Debi Pearl’s novel, The Vision, but I had not mentioned it as I had yet to find a  review of it which did not appear to be a press release.  That is until now.  Quiver Mamma has some issues with this book and shares them in Book Review: The Vision (The Last Publishers) by Debi Pearl.

Review of “Yell and Tell”

The Christian Post has a review of Debi Pearl’s Yell and Tell series.  This is a positive review but unlike most I’ve seen, they don’t promote her other books nor link to their website.   I wonder if they are aware of the controversy around them.

For another opinion on the series, see TulipGirl’s review. Hers is the 3rd on the page at this time.

Mixed feelings about Created To Be His Help Meet

Elizabeth, at Virginia Is For Mothers, reviews Created To Be His Help Meet. While she got a lot of positive things out of it, she has some concerns.  I am linking to this post for 2 reasons.

1) This is a good review to share with people who got a lot out of the book and are wondering what could possibly be wrong with it.  If you share a very negative review with them, they will likely be resistant to the message therein.  This review brings up concerns from someone who, for the most part, liked the book.

2) She is interested to know what others got out of it.   I assume that she will find her way here and may be interested in the other reviews which I have collected.

By the way, she asks what we think about the allegation that Bathsheba can be blamed for enticing King David by bathing on her roof. The roof in those days was what our patios are today, it was probably enclosed and she probably did not expect anyone to be able to see her. I’m not sure if that was the usual custom or not. Also, the Bible says that it was the time when Kings go to war. I have heard many sermons teach that King David had no business in the palace at all because he was supposed to be at war leading his men. It seems to me that she thought that all the men were at war and would not be spying on her. But even if she were trying to entice him, the fault would still be his for not looking away and resisting. We can look at Joseph in his encounter with Potiphar’s wife to see how God expects a man to react to temptation.

Bethany Breaks Free

Bethany Basset, of Coffee Stained Clarity, reflects on the sadness she feels at finding out that her high school friends are following the Pearls’ teachings.

I see that Bethany was raised in the VF/Patriarchy mindset.  She posts her story in 5 parts:

The Preface: The Stuff of Brains
Part 1: The Net
Part 2: The Reality
Part 3: The Hope
Part 4: The Outcome

And she has an epilogue about parenting with grace here.  I love a happy ending.  <3

Dolly Mama

Since yesterday’s post was about Patriocentricity and I have this link which mentions Debi Pearl, I might as well share it.  Dolly Mama writes about some parallels she sees between the FLDS movement and the patriocentric movement in Escape, FLDS, and some parallels.

An Open Letter to Debi Pearl

Another wife has tried and tested Debi Pearl’s Book, Created To Be His Help Meet and found that it nearly destroyed both her and her marriage. She tells her story in An Open Letter To Debi Pearl.

ThatMom Responds to Joy about Debi Pearl

I just came across an interesting post from ThatMom about Debi Pearl and her book, Created To Be His Helpmeet. She is responding to Joy, who defended Debi Pearl in a comment on a previous post back in March of 2010:

Responding to Joy about Debi Pearl

The Pearls Take On Protecting Children from Sexual Abuse

I feel obligated to post the information that the Pearls are working on a new book about protecting children from sexual abuse.   Debi Pearl posted that info on her blog at http://www.debipearl.com/blogs/blog/1740302-cultivating-cautious-chicks-protecting-children-from-predators.  I found this post through my Google Alerts which hit a thread on Free Jinger about how said blog post was altogether wrong in its information about chickens. http://freejinger.yuku.com/topic/2475/t/Pearls–Writing–New-Book—Know—Chickens–Children.html

I have to admit that I have mixed feelings about this news.  I believe that many of their teachings do make a child vulnerable to abuse and therefore is is good that they are addressing that.  I hope that the advice they give turns out to be useful advice and will end up protecting children rather than hurting them more as much of their advice does.


Update: Debi Pearl is releasing a children’s book designed to prepare and protect children from sexual molestation and it actually looks pretty good.

Update Nov 2010: The book, Samuel Learns To Yell And Tell has been released.   Here is TulipGirl’s review of the book.  If you are not familiar with TulipGirl, please see my sidebar for a link to her site.

Behind Closed Doors

Glenys shares a heartbreaking and powerful blog entry about an abusive marriage and exposes how damaging the advice contained in Created To Be His Helpmeet, by Debi Pearl, is.

Preparing To Be A Help Meet

I find it odd that Yahoo News has a good review of Debi Pearl’s newest book, Preparing To Be A Help Meet.

You may comment on that article there as well as on the Topix site.

Yahoo did not allow me to submit my comment, probably because it was a link to this site.  My concerns about this new book are based on my concerns about the original book Created To Be His Help Meet.  I have links to many book reviews of that book which explain the dangerous teachings in that book.


Edited to add:  As of Dec 23, 2010 those link are no longer valid.  Just as well.  😉

Patriarchy

I have 2 interesting book reviews for 2 books that were recently published about the patriarchy movement.  I do not think that the Pearls are directly involved in this movement, but their names to tend to come up and it appears that Debi Pearl was interviewed for the first book:

Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement: 3 Stars by ThatMom

Quivering Daughters – Hillary McFarland on Patriarchy by Barbara Curtis from Mommy Life